If you’re one of those who don’t like to read long texts, click many links, use your eyes and in general are a lazy bastard, boy do we have a treat for you.

Introducing the Repaint Search v2, now labeled as “good” by the authorities, bringing new Improved Qualitee™, and an almost working auto-suggest feature. [...]

[Majel Barrett]: Last time, on Star Trek: Voyager …*
No, wait, what? Damn remote! Woman, get me some new batteries!
When we left off in July of ‘07, Craig was being beaten by a group of bullies for losing his hard drive; Denis finally punched a customer, pow, right in the kisser, for mouthing off; and [...]

‘Twas a clear night in 1972’s Lagos. Mr. X sat on his favorite chair, smoking his favorite pipe, drinking his favorite beer, when suddenly he saw two shooting stars passing right over his head. A clear sign, of course. He knew immediately this was a religious sign. What else could it be? A premonition [...]

Some names have been changed to protect identities of the innocent.
Once upon a time, there was a man, so evil, even The Evil League of Evil wasn’t evil enough to have him ceremonially inducted as a prime member. For the purpose of this fairy tale, his name, from now on, shall be Theodore Dungeonmaster III.
— [...]

Parties, cheap women, cheaper wine, Ho-Downs, more women, fast cars, slow days, flying monkeys serving us drinks, and more of that delicious panda meat. From now on TFS is playing in the big league. Well, not the big league exactly. The middle league, maybe. Well, the minor league. Okay, admitted, we still operate in [...]

Some anonymous source handed us a secret copy of tomorrow’s edition of the Fructus Gazette. We won’t hesitate to share it with you.

Fructus Gazette

Although we know about the violent delicacy of this topic, according to our whistleblower the model in question can evidently be found on our Bombardier Dash8-300 page.

Prologue: just imagine John Madden doing a Frank Caliendo impersonation doing a John Madden impersonation.
Heads up! We’ve just created GOD! It’s an almighty, omnipotent, grey-bearded, some would say devine machine, watching over all of us – you, me, him, everybody! Except for him. That’s right, GOD doesn’t like him!
It can be found here and [...]

“Oooooooonce … moooooooore … we oooopen the doooooor…”
Stop your fracking singing, Craig!
Céline Dion may be the unwelcome leading product when it comes to spreading the Canadian feeling, but this bird sure makes a better sound. While sharing similar looks (except for the blades – the Dash uses six on each side, while Dion only carries [...]

…to your skies!
Ever wondered if that sexy girl at a party has a little sister? One with less botox and less silicon? Well, we’ve got the answer to your question: Sweden’s Christmas Babe of the Year, the Saab 340 a.k.a. Lil’ Egberta.

The Saab 340 Fruit

Greta Bustysson’s little sister comes with a body measurement of [...]

krckzszzzzz … [insert funny text here] … krrrrrkrzz present … A310 … shshskrkrkrshsh Craig Ri… krrrzckksh … XML fla… krrr … funny looking krkrkrkshshszzzh LODs … kkrssssszzzkkhk Eleva… krkrkrkrkrrr etymological Ornithologist shshshshshsh CAN’T HEAR YOU! shshshshshsh … Paints by … krzs ris Le Ve… krrkssshhzz John Ma … krssh SPEAK UP, BASTARD! sssssshsssh [...]

Gee whiz for housewives

Gee Whiz for women

Gee Whiz

Don’t stand too close! As could be seen at our HQ, those props can easily fall off and hurt someone. The Fruit Stand presents the Swedish Girl of the Year, the Saab 2000 – internally known as Greta Bustysson.

The Saab 2000 Fruit

Its body measurements are 2915 sexy polys, a very tantalizing animated landing [...]

As time passes, and we all grow older yet mostly less wise, you get to a certain point where you can’t help but thank all those people you’ve met on the road, who helped you with your projects and endeavors, who’ve tolerated your hideous vanity, who’ve grown accustomed to your quirks. So, we’ve put [...]

“Hey, where’ve you been?!” “Hey, whatcha doin’?” “Hey, wtf, why aren’t you posting anymore?! Where’s our free stuff?!” All those nice questions that we may or may not have gotten over the last four months can finally be laid to rest.
The Worldwide The Fruit Stand Conglomerate Monopolistic Global Metro Headquarters™ has moved! Yes, [...]

What may be used to describe almost anything, now comes as the tagline for our newest set of polished tubes with wings. The Fruit Stand is happy to announce the release of Craig Ritchie’s Airbus A300.

The Airbus A300B2-B4 Fruit

You’ll get the whole deal, the A300B2-B4 and the A300-600, both flavoured with spicey engine variants [...]

2007 is almost gone and The Fruit Stand releases Number 10. We’re rounding off the year and end the line with Craig Ritchie’s Airbus A330-200 model.

The Airbus A330-200 Fruit

And as it’s this time of the year the model comes – apart from the usual features like several LODs, animated landing gear, thrust reversers, drooping [...]

The Fruit Stand is happy to release to the AI world a Christmas present, the Airbus A330-300 by Craig Ritchie – following the newest tradition of snowy treats at this time of the year. Like the previous Airbus models the new one comes complete with several LODs and features animated landing gear, thrust reversers, [...]

Yes, we goofed again resulting in a major overhaul of our Airbus A340-300 model, so no more missing spoilers on LOD 2-4 (that’s the first unpopular thing) other things that changed are described in the ReadMe.
Additionally Craig Ritchie’s Airbus A340-200 is leaving the assembly line today after some successful test engine run’s & flickering [...]

Deal with it!

“As people who believe, according to our faith, we will go to Heaven when we die, we are pretty sure that there is bug hunting in Heaven!”
The Fruit Stand happily announces the release of the updated Airbus A340-600 and -500 models. The main reason for these updates was the fact that we goofed and [...]

The Fruit Stand happily introduces the ‘Bigger Brother’ of the previously released Boeing 787-800 Airbus A340-500 model, the Boeing 787-900 A340-600 which – once again – is a Craig Ritchie creation.

The Airbus A340-600 Fruit

And you might have already guessed that this model comes complete with several LODs and features animated landing gear, thrust reversers, [...]

This promiscuous little site now features a development timeline; but we’d rather call it ‘Tales of Interest’. So to speak, it features an entire ten-page essay on The Fruit Stand’s history, including a prologue, and of course excluding an epilogue. While we were not sure this might be too precarious information to give away, [...]

. . . so high on the polycount that it almost doesn’t even fly!
The Fruit Stand is happy to release yet again another Craig Ritchie AI Model, the Airbus A340-500.
A bit like our previous models this Airbus comes complete with several LODs and features animated landing gear, thrust reversers, drooping elevators and XML controlled [...]

The Fruit Stand is happy to release to the AI world two Craig Ritchie AI Models at once, the Boeing 777-200 and 777-300. Like the previous 777 models these new ones come complete with several LODs, and feature animated landing gear, thrust reversers, drooping elevators, XML controlled flaps and several engine variations per model [...]

The Fruit Stand is happy to release to the AI world yet another Craig Ritchie AI Model, the Boeing 777-200LR. Like the 777-300ER this new model comes complete with several LODs, and features animated landing gear, thrust reversers, drooping elevators, and XML controlled flaps.

The Boeing 777-200LR Fruit

Check avsim.com and flightsim.com for the 777-200LR, along [...]

After long delays on the factory floor, the Fruit Stand is proud to release to the AI world Craig Ritchie’s latest AI Model, the Boeing 777-300ER. The model comes complete with several LODs, and features animated landing gear, thrust reversers, tail skid, drooping elevators, and XML controlled flaps that work really well 95% of [...]